Not Your Average Mommy Blogger

19, Married, Son...The rest are just small details right now.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

That damn Maxim will do it every time...

For the last few weeks, I've been getting a bunch of magazines in the mail. I don't have subscriptions to any of them, and I haven't paid for any of them, but I do enjoy reading them. Yesterday I got the new US Weekly, Maxim, Hollywood Life, and American Baby. Yeah, it was a good day, magazine wise.

Will and I settled into our bedroom to chill out, and guess which one he picks up? Why, American Baby, of course. (You gotta know I'm not serious.) Duh, he went directly for Maxim.

I can soo deal with my husband looking at other girls! Thankfully, I'm very secure with myself, and confident with the way I look. I think pregnancy has brought out the best in me, and I'm lucky to have gained almost 40 pounds of extra beauty. I feel perfectly Ruebenesque.

Ahem.

So, back to reality, I'm feeling like a cow and Will picks up this magazine full of half-naked size 0s. So, okay, I can deal with that. I decide to conveniently "change into my pajamas". Let's not forget that I'm wearing my pretty red lacy thong, which doesn't make me feel sexy, but makes me feel like I should feel sexy.

I saunter around, nonchalantly, and go to put my pajamas on. And the bastard glances up, AS IF TO SIMPLY SEE WHAT I'M DOING, and then looks back down at the magazine. What the fuck?!

After about an hour of me being pissed, and eventually breaking down into sobs of "You're" *sniff* "never ever gonna" *siffle* "look at me like I'm sexy AGAIN!", and an actual tirade about how I wished I were covered in moles, because it would be better than my "problem" now (I swear, I couldn't make this shit up), Will tells me that he thinks I'm beautiful as ever, but my moodiness is really fucking hard to deal with.

Well then. At least he was honest.

For some reason, the explanation of "You look good, but you're a serious pain in the ass" made me feel a lot better.

1 Comments:

At 12:25 AM, Blogger Lisa said...

I would be honored if you linked me. And yes, I know what you mean about how the hot girls make you feel worse when you are pregnant. Been there! :-)

 

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